Anyone who has lived with or worked with an alcoholic or drug addict knows the wounds that harsh, abusive words can create. When under the influence of alcohol or drugs, people tend to say things they do not mean, be it insincere words of love, empty promises, bitter accusations or offensive language. Likewise, families and friends of alcoholics and addicts speak before thinking when their emotions are running high. They may make idle threats and offer false bribes to their addicted loved one in order to attempt to control the situation. They may erupt in anger and frustration when they are blamed for causing their loved one to drink or use drugs. One of the most valuable tools of recovery is to think before speaking. You might ask yourself these questions first: Does this need to be said? Does it need to be said right now? Does it need to be said by me? Most like, the answer to one or all of the questions is a resounding, “No!” http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/6-reasons-why-you-should-think-before-you-speak.html
Acronym Serves As Reminder
A favorite acronym in recovery circles is THINK. It is another way to remember to pause before offering unsought advice or opinions or before starting a verbal eruption that will hurt another person. Easily remembered, it can stop many problems before they start.
- T – Is it thoughtful?
- H – Is it honest?
- I – Is it intelligent?
- N – Is it necessary?
- K – Is it kind?
This acronym is especially helpful to friends and families of alcoholics and addicts. They will discover that they less they say, the more they will focus on their own lives. They will come to understand they cannot control or cure their loved one’s addiction. While under the influence of drugs or alcohol, one cannot concentrate well enough to pay attention to an acronym, but it serves equally as well when thinking about picking up a drink or drug. This important tool of avoiding conflict helps everyone involved in heading toward recovery. http://www.marinal-anon.org/pages/welcome/members-stories/think.php