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When Should You Disclose Your Recovery in a Relationship?

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When Should You Disclose Your Recovery in a Relationship?

Your recovery is your personal story. It’s sentimental and you should feel proud for being a recovering addict. Despite what others think, you are amazing and every morning you should feel accomplished and excited for what’s to come. Taking your recovery day by day is an important part because it adds more stress when you think about the future. Will you be sober in a month? In a year? Or in 10 years? You don’t want to put that pressure on yourself. You’re sober today and that’s what matters. But the more you’re sober, the more responsibilities you take on. Finding a safe and supportive place to live, getting a job, paying bills, and dating. Whether you’re dreading the idea of dating or you’re excited about it, it’s going to come. And it’s entirely up to you on how you should disclose your recovery to your date.

This topic can go two ways, and it’s really up to you on what you want to do. It’s a personal and controversial topic and people will either be okay with it or they won’t. Some people think to disclose your recovery before or when you first start dating, and others think it’s okay to disclose it a little later on. So, what should you do?

Pros to Disclose Your Recovery Early On

  • Get it off your chest
  • You’re able to be completely honest
  • You can share your past better
  • You don’t have to hide it
  • You’ll know if you’re date is okay with it

Pros to Disclose Your Recovery Later On

  • You can see if you really like your date enough
  • Feel comfortable telling your date
  • You’ll know if your date is the real thing (The last curveball confession)

If you’re not comfortable telling your date about your recovery, that’s okay. There is no need to rush if you don’t feel comfortable rushing it. Just focus on what you want and how you feel about your date and go from there. It’s also nice to change your perspective and think about how you’d feel if the tables were turned and your date was telling you they are in recovery. Would you want them to tell you as soon as possible or would you be okay if they told you later on in the relationship?

Risks of Telling your Date Soon

  • It could scare them
  • You don’t know if they will stay or leave
  • You might not be ready

Risks of Waiting in your Relationship

  • Possible loss of trust
  • Possible loss of respect
  • Harder to disclose your recovery
  • Waiting and waiting and never actually telling them

In Conclusion…

It is totally your decision. It’s your life, your recovery, and your story. If you’re not comfortable with it, then you can wait. If you’re embarrassed by your recovery, maybe you should talk to someone. And if you’re ready and you flaunt your recovery because you’re proud, then it shouldn’t hold you back from telling your date. If you want to be honest up front, tell them.

If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, please call us at 855-737-7363. We want to help and give you resources for a successful recovery. We are here for you.

Posted in Recovery